Learn How To Find A Good Man
If you’re a woman under 40, you probably already know how hard it can be to find a man who has good character. There’s just something about life in the 2000s that turns young men into lying, selfish, misogynistic creeps. Even the men that seem to be sweet can end up being jerks. I don’t know if it’s the internet, television, or just something about our modern culture, but so many men just seem to lack a moral center. And the saddest part is that so many women lower their expectations to match the poor-quality men. How often do you see an attractive, intelligent, sweet woman end up with a complete idiot? Depressingly often. In fact, most of my female friends are like that, to be honest.
If it sounds like I’m bitter about men, think again. Because realistically there are actually good guys in this world. They may only be about 1% of the under-40 male population, and they do tend to get snatched up very quickly, but there are definitely a few single ones out there. Every woman wants different things from a man, so I can’t tell you exactly what you should do to attract the perfect man for you, but here are a few things to keep in mind.
1. Respect yourself. Bad men prey upon women who have low self-esteem. And the sad thing is, that many women just let these guys get away with it. Know that you are special, and have no patience for men who don’t know how to treat you with respect right off the bat. For instance, if a man stares at your body, makes gestures, or makes disrespectful advances at you in a public place, take that as a warning sign. Good men don’t do things like this.
2. Be modest. If you play up your looks from the start, you’ll attract men who only care about looks, and you’ll set a precedent that will stand for as long as you’re dating that person. You don’t have to dress like a Puritan, but try to dress in a way that won’t attract attention from the types of men who have no tact. First impressions are important, so when you meet the right man for you, you want him to know from the beginning that your mind is your most important feature.
3. Look for men who don’t rush. A sweet man usually takes his time getting to know you before asking you out. Depending on the situation, he’ll probably want to chat and get to know you first. For instance, if you have a crush on someone you see regularly—a co-worker, for instance—there’s no need to rush into asking him out. And when you do ask him out, make it casual. You don’t have to turn it into a big, important date. Some of the best, most healthy relationships start out as friendships, at least for a little while.
4. Make sure he’s interested in you. If a man is only interested in you for your looks, this is probably never going to change. Don’t waste your time with someone who isn’t interested in getting to know you deeply as a person. If all your conversations are shallow, and if he doesn’t ask you questions about yourself, he doesn’t deserve you. He’s either self-centered, or just a shallow person.
Caterina Christakos is a published author and reviewer. Read her latest reviews of high yield investments and high yield money markets.
Tags: dating advice, love, relationships
This entry was posted on Saturday, June 5th, 2010 at 12:43 am and is filed under Dating. You can follow any responses to this entry through the RSS 2.0 feed. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.
